Dr. Morter, an expert in emotional health and its connection with physical well-being stated: “No matter how well we camouflage our negative past experiences our subconscious memory has them stored away, ready to leap out when a similar negative experience triggers the response, and we damage ourselves all over again by reliving that past negative experience. Continuous subtle negative feelings, such as depression, worry, guilt, self-pity, resentment, and frustration, reduce the vibrancy of your surrounding (energy) field which, in turn, interferes with the flow of health….”
“Collect postage stamps, or collect coins, if you wish but don’t collect grudges!” Dynamic Health – Dr. M. Ted Morter Jr. – pages 59 – 76
Negative experiences and feelings can drain us on a variety of levels. Interestingly, Dr. Morter believes that negative emotions are usually much stronger than positive feelings. There are some effective emotional therapies that help both doctor and patient identify the reasons for an emotional imbalance that could be contributing to ones deteriorating health.
Simply put, “if you want to be healthy, first learn to forgive others.” On the other hand, if you want to remain with high blood pressure, arthritis, sore back, headaches and so on, hold a grudge and store all the bitterness that life throws your way.
“When looking for faults use a mirror, not a telescope.”
How to Forgive
There are three ideas to keep clear in mind which can help us in the forgiving process:
1. Forgive the person that hurt you.
‘Easier said than done’ you may say. But in reality, to forgive is simple:
Step 1) accept what has happened.
Step 2) Express how the other person’s actions made you feel.
Step 3) Put the matter behind you.
Don’t allow emotions to blind you to these three simple steps.
2. Forgive yourself.
Does that sound strange to you? It is likely you feel you haven’t done anything wrong, but the idea is to forgive yourself for any possible role you might have played, knowingly or unknowingly, that could have caused this hurt between you the other person. Many times, the real reason we hold a grudge against others is that the person we really can’t forgive is ourselves.
3. Look for something good in the negative experience.
What have you learned from what happened? What could be done so this does not happen again in the future? Think of life as a school that we never stop attending; we never graduate, we are always learning. Whether the experiences we have are good or bad, we still need to look for and find the ‘good.’
At the Budwig Center, we provide emotional therapy sessions. Watch this video to learn more:
He Who Learns to Forgive – Learns to Live
Learning to forgive and then moving on with our life is perhaps one of the most important lessons that we all need. This concept of ‘getting even’ and fighting fire with fire is self-destructive. Gandhi made a very astute comment when he said: “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.”
When we hold a grudge, it is like drinking poison and hoping that the other person gets sick. Forgiveness is liberating; it provides true freedom! And never forget that forgiving oneself is always the hardest part but learning how to forgive others makes it easier.
To learn more about the emotional therapies offered at the Budwig Center CLICK HERE>>>
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong” – Gandhi.
IT NOT ABOUT THEM ANYWAY
People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered
Forgive them, anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Be kind, anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you.
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous.
Be happy, anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow.
Do good, anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough.
Give the world the best you’ve got, anyway.
You see in the final analysis it’s between you and God.
It was never between you and them anyway.
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